Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater: Is It True?

VIVA – Many people believe that "once a cheater, always a cheater" because a lot of people who ever being unfaithful always do the same mistake, but recently, a study finds that this is not necessarily true.

One study published in 2017 addressed this issue, aiming to precisely demonstrate the likelihood of recurring infidelity.

The researchers observed 484 mixed couples and found that 44 percent of the participants reported engaging in infidelity at some point during the relationship.

The analysis also revealed that those who had cheated in the past were three times more likely to cheat again compared to those who had never attempted adultery.

"The past becomes important for a relationship. What we do at every step in our romantic history ultimately affects what will happen next," said study author Kayla Knopp in a statement.

However, according to psychologist Kristin Davin and neurologist Heidi Moawad, not everyone who has cheated will cheat again. However, serial cheaters are individuals who actively seek sexual partners through a pattern of continuous infidelity.

While there is no official psychological term for it, there are certain personality traits that may make some individuals more inclined towards being unfaithful, according to therapist Ainhoa Plata. This includes people with narcissistic personality disorder.

"Narcissistic individuals use others to feel loved and admired. They enjoy challenges and constantly prove to themselves that they are superior to others. For this reason, they enjoy the passion of falling in love. They feel more admired and appreciated in that space than in a long-term relationship," Plata explained.

Furthermore, Plata explained that narcissistic individuals are not satisfied with stable and lasting relationships because, over time, their partners gain independence and stop idolizing them. Infidelity satisfies the narcissist's needs.

Individuals with low self-esteem are also vulnerable to serial infidelity. They may rebel against commitment or seek validation from others, Ines Barcenas stated. 

"Thus, not all unfaithful individuals have personality disorders or mental issues. Sometimes, infidelity must be specifically done with a particular partner," she added.

Of course, there are many other reasons why someone may engage in repeated deception. But the good news is that it can be addressed and cheaters can reform.

"There is no quick fix. You have to work on your identity, self-esteem. It's a very long journey that involves exploring and reconfiguring the relationship between oneself and others. But yes, it is possible to become better and to be better for others," Barcenas said.